Now Fear This: The Bay

Chew with your mouth closed, Skeleton Dave. Horror movies depend on two factors: plausibility and proximity. In many modern horror films, these are the first two things to go right out the window. Compare any relatively recent remake to the original. What used to be nondescript suburban...

Yakmala: Next

“You… you see that right?” “Giant Nicolas Cage head? Nope.” This is kind of embarrassing. When picking movies to review, I look through various providers to see what they have to offer. I saw Next was available, and thought, “Hey, Nicolas Cage sees the future, plus Rose...

Lifetime Theater: Drew ...

For better or worse, Meredith Baxter and Valerie Bertinelli are indelibly associated in the public consciousness with Lifetime movies. Both women possessed the irresistible combination of recognizable faces and affordable price tags that guaranteed they would have work in TV movies...

Now Fear This: You’re N...

This shouldn’t be news, but there is a language to film. Languages of all kinds have rules, which is what prevents us from screaming obscenities in the middle of the street and calling it the St. Crispin’s Day Speech. Well, that and all those cease and desist orders. So when a film...

Yakmala: Sex Madness

Sometimes it’s nice to take a break from all the slickly-produced big budget crap, and watch some non-produced no-budget crap. You know, the kind of movie that treats a single in focus shot like the rarest of unicorns, whose dialogue is swallowed by a crackle so loud you’d swear Paul...